Many writers have shared their thoughts with the public:

"There is something delicious about writing the first words of a story. You never quite know where they'll take you." - Beatrix Potter

"The role of a writer is not to say what we all can say, but what we are unable to say." - Anaïs Nin

"Sharing your writing, being enlarged by others' writing, is what makes you feel famous." - Gretchen Bernabei

"Writing is not an amusing occupation. It is a combination of ditch-digging, mountain-climbing, treadmill and childbirth." - Edna Ferber

"Either write something worth reading or do something worth writing." - Ben Franklin

"One must be drenched in words, literally soaked in them, to have the right ones to form themselves into the proper pattern at the right moment." - Hart Crane

"There are three rules for writing. Unfortunately, no one can agree what they are." - W. Somerset Maugham

Gorgeous and the Pink Panties

I am the younger of twins. My sister stole most of my food in the womb. As a result, I was born small. She was born late at night and immediately accepted by our mother. Five hours later, as the sun was rising, I was born. My mother thought that I was the afterbirth, piddled on me, and then ignored me.

I was found some time later, considered an orphan, and was adopted into what I would later know as the family home and kept warm. However, I never enjoyed the maternal bond of suckling but was fed milk from a bottle. I learned later that the family consisted of a very large male named Jack Love, or Dad, a female named Sally Darling, or Mum, and two girls, the eldest named Gorgeous, and her sister named Sweetie. Their younger brother was called Junior. These names seemed to change from time to time especially when they misbehaved. They were most unusual as they walked on two legs only. There were two others called dogs which were named Hamish and Shallot, who like me walked on all four legs The children thought it great fun to have me added to the family and named me Drongo.

I was totally spoiled. Often shampooed until my coat was white, combed, and brushed. I even had a large blue bow tied around my tail. The children tried to put me into nappies but with limited success. My willy was well separated from my bum while my scrotum was hanging in between. It seemed to grow faster than the rest of me!

Soon I developed the overwhelming desire to eat grass so was allowed to wander outside to graze the family lawn and play games with the children and the dogs. The games were great fun!

I soon found that it was not acceptable to climb over furniture in the house, nor was it acceptable to pee and poop inside. Also, it was unacceptable to climb up onto the large dining table and sample their food, especially at the evening meal when Jack Love was often tired and short-tempered. There were numerous discussions, which I never understood, on something called 'house training.' In the event of failure, there were discussions regarding something about BBQing me. It involved a pit called the BBQ. It was a hole in the ground semi-filled with ashes over the middle of which was a metal bar, on posts, which could be turned, by hand or a small motor. I began to get the idea that maybe the adults in the family, especially Jack Love, wanted to strap me onto this over a fire, to cook and eat me.

Sometime later, I was taken to a paddock in which were several large versions similar to me. I was led to one of these and told that she was my mother. She just butted me and walked away. None of the other animals took any notice of me. I felt very lonely and frightened. It was then that I learned how to get through the fencing and back to the house. Subsequently, I was allowed to remain on the lawn during the day but relegated to a straw-bedded pen in a shed at night. Jack Love refused to have me back in the house, despite the pleading from the children, especially Junior.

The children and the dogs proved to be good friends and we spent many fun times together. If any of them was in trouble with their parents they would come and hide with me in my pen. I too used to get relegated to the pen when I simply ate the plants growing in a so-called vegetable garden. Maybe because the family ate them each night at something called dinner.

At the front of the house, there was a series of garden beds growing the most delightful plants with masses of beautifully coloured and tasty foliage. One day when I walked into the house with some of the coloured petals hanging from my mouth Sally Darling gave out loud screams as she rushed outside to find that I had destroyed her prize plants, which I later knew as roses. She picked up a nearby broom and began chasing me with it. I thought this was a new game and began biting it and trying to pull it from her. She screamed and cried so loudly that Jack Love came rushing in from a shed where he had been working. When he saw what was the cause of Sally Darlings' distress he took the broom from her and beat me severely as he dragged me to my pen. I was locked in there for a week as punishment and fed nothing but water and my bedding straw. The children were banned from playing with me and I became very sad and lonely. However, it did not take me long to find that I could open the pen gate using my front legs.

One day I left my pen and while grazing I came across a basket full of damp but sweet-smelling fabrics. I managed to eat one, but what I later found to my dismay, was an item called a sock, which unfortunately belonged to Jack Love, head of the household. Once again I was confined to my pen as punishment. Subsequently, whenever this basket of articles appeared I was quickly relegated to what had become my prison cell. On one occasion when Sally Darling had been called away, to talk to a mysterious black object. I opened the gate and took a fine soft garment from the basket. I learned later it was called a pantie, and somehow trapped it over my head and around one front leg.

When the children saw me they fell over laughing while the dogs didn't know whether they should attack me as an intruder or grab hold of the pantie and set up a tug-of-war game with me. While this was going on Gorgeous arrived in a car with a group of her friends. She was livid when she realized that I had trapped over my head a pair of her best silk pink panties. It became more of an issue when her friends began laughing and teasing her. Finally, they all tried to catch me. I thought that they were playing a game with me so kept avoiding them. Her brother and sister joined in and so did the dogs. There was pandemonium! Finally one of the dogs, Hamish, managed to grab the pantie which ripped as he pulled it off me. I ran out into the paddock still hearing the children laughing while, Gorgeous, the owner of the panties was in tears and screaming words that her mother told her were disgusting. She also looked at her friends and told them that they were disgusting as well and should leave immediately, which they did while still laughing.

That evening the whole family gathered in the BBQ area and dragged me there as well. I panicked as I thought I was going to be BBQued. Although I tried desperately to get away it was to no avail. Something far worse followed. A decision was made that I was now too large to be treated as a pet and that I should go elsewhere.

Jack Love wanted me killed and eaten but the rest of the family decided that they should find me a new home on another property where there were more of my kind.

Almost every evening over the next week, the family discussed whether or not a new home had been found for me or whether I should be BBQued over the weekend. Finally, one was found where the owners wanted something called, 'a NEW STUD.' On the weekend I was loaded onto a trailer and after a seriously long time, we arrived at what appeared to be a large property with several paddocks. In one of these, there was a small group of animals similar to me. I was taken from the trailer and released into this paddock.

I heard the new people discussing me and how I looked. They spent considerable time, with laughter, especially on the size of my scrotum and whether I would know what to do or be a drongo.

Almost immediately some of the females, which I later learned were called ewes, approached me showing some interest, also, I thought, mainly in the size of my scrotum. Shortly I began to feel an urge that I had never experienced before. Not long after I started to nuzzle them and chase them around the paddock I was hit by a tremendous force, that almost knocked me off my feet. I realized that I had been charged by another animal similar to me, a mature buck that, obviously was jealous of my interest in his ewes. Although I had never been in a serious fight before but had learned to butt in games with the children, my response to his continued charges was to rise up on my back legs and butt him back. It seemed that after a time he realized that I was younger and stronger than him. He left me with some of his ewes and returned to the other side of the paddock where there were more of his harem.

The ones who had taken an early interest in me stayed with me and once again I began to feel an almost uncontrollable urge to mount them. Mother nature and my genes then assured me that I lost my virginity, accompanied by the cheers and obscene comments of the onlooking humans. The next few days were utter bliss as I tupped all of the 'ladies' that had stayed with me. I had no time to eat and lost a considerable amount of weight. My presence became redundant as my 'ladies' ignored me as they began to put on an obscene amount of weight. Some months later I saw the products of my earlier endeavours. There were two sets of twins and several single lambs, and even one set of triplets. One weekend, my new owners came to the paddock with Jack Love and Sally Darling to show them that I was indeed not a drongo but a well-proven stud.

Since that time, several years ago, there have been no discussions on the possibility of my being BBQued, only the annual praise as to my abilities as a stud.

However, I have just noticed that another young buck has been introduced to my paddock and that some of my ewes have migrated toward him. As I am walking towards him to put him in his place I am wondering what happened to the old buck that I had to fight when I first came to this property.

Was he BBQued?